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Mercury in Retrograde July 2019

When is it?​


Oh dear... oh goodness....


It's from July 7th - July 31st, and then again this year from October 31st (whatever mercury, ruining a witch's Halloween) - November 20th.


What does it mean?

It means you're slightly more likely to have a 2007 Britney-esq meltdown. You may feel the urge to get back in contact with your ex. You might find little annoyances a bit more unbearable. 

But whatever happens, please... leave your hair alone.


Joking aside, the event of Mercury being in retrograde means that Mercury is moving backwards and away from us, and this messes up the mental state of the signs. However, Mercury is not actually moving backwards.


What's happening is that Mercury is following its usual course around the sun, and as always, this involves a changing in it's observed  position to the Earth. But in the position it is currently in, it appears to us body-bound-spirits that it's moving backwards when in fact Earth just appears to be moving faster than Mercury in orbit. 


Confused?

Imagine you're flying on a broomstick. Another witch flies by on a broomstick and overtakes you. From your perspective, clearly she is going faster. 


No one flies faster than you. You're the Supreme. Put her in her place. 


So, you lean in and speed up. Before you know it, you're zooming past that silly witch. And, as you go past her (cackling of course), from your perspective she appears to be going backwards. But, of course, she's not really going backwards. You're just overtaking her, which makes her look to be going backwards. 

So... yeah. That's what's happening. Basically, Mercury isn't really going backward, it just looks like it's going backwards as Earth overtakes it. 

Regardless, this seems to mess with the signs. We all lose our bearings a little bit while it's happening. Maybe it's Mercury it's self, flipping us off as we overtake her, who knows.


Anyhoo, I've put together a compilation of how each sign should be effected by this crazy business in the sky.


Capricorn



Mercury in Retrograde  seems to be putting a real halt to your plans and it's driving you nuts. You're a Capricorn. You want to be in control of your success, and in control of your failures, but Mercury seems to have snatched the reins from you. Grr. You hate losing control. But Capricorn... you're a sea-goat for god's sake. A SEA-GOAT. You can swim in the sea AND walk on land using your two front legs to drag your fish butt behind you. You can do ANYTHING. Don't let Mercury in Retrograde get you down. You're so versatile. You're so majestic. And weird. You can do it.


Aquarius



You're great at adapting and love a challenge, so even though Mercury in Retrograde is a pain and causing everything to sink to the depths metaphorically, you're weirdly excited by this. It's an opportunity to get creative and improve yourself. Bring it, Mercury. Aquarius is ready. Annoyed, but ready. Use that big water jug you're always carrying for some reason to pour some cool water on your sister signs who are currently losing their sht.


Pisces



Mercury is blocking your intuition, and this could cause some awkward and uncomfortable moments for you. You feel the need to tread carefully, as your psychic radar seems to be on the fritz and your signals are getting all mixed up. This is a stressful time. Maybe relax in a pool. You're a fish, you should like pools. Pools are definitely your thing. The best part is, no one will see your tears because they'll just blend in with the water.


Aries



Oh dear, Aries. You like to go full speed ahead and charge at your goals, but you can't when Mercury is in retrograde. Mercury likes to cause technology to glitch and transport to break down, keeping you from fulfilling your goals as soon as humanly possible. This may give you a bit of a temper. You are more prone to losing your cool until the end of July, but it'd be cool to remember that ramming your horned head into random passer-by's won't do you any good in the long run. 


Taurus


You will be more prone to being impulsive and impatient during this Mercury in Retrograde, which are two things you usually are not. Seeing yourself lose your cool and make impulsive decisions could be alarming and upsetting to you, especially if it effects your relationships. Maybe let your family and friends pet your fury Tauren head to regain that closeness and calmness you're so missing. Cuddles are always good. 


Gemini


So basically you should be completely losing it right now, as Mercury is YOUR planet. But, you're actually not that bothered by this Mercury in Retrograde. You're keeping it pretty cool, and may pleasantly surprise yourself at your confidence and inventiveness as you use your roadblocks to discover new roads. Better roads. Give your twin a high five.


Cancer


You're currently a crab who wishes they were a hermit. You'll be wanting to seek refuge as everything crumbles around you, and you may develop a temper. You don't like all the chaos of Mercury in Retrograde, and you desire more than anything to hide until it's over. Go away Mercury! Leave me alone! *cries in crab*. Nah but really, just be careful, as your attempts to hide coupled with the potential for a temper could cause you some probs. 


Leo


Take a deep breath and try not to get too frazzled. You love to take the lead and be the star, but you'll be more prone to embarrassing mishaps in front of others while Mercury is taunting you from above. Try not to eat anyone. It's ok, really. It happens to everyone. Just rehearse your presentation as best you can, and buy some ice cream for after... you know, just in case.


Virgo


Disorder. Chaos. Lack of routine. Mercury in retrograde is your actual living hell. It's ok though, Virgo. It will pass (and try not to bite Scorpio's head off as she reminds you of this). Use your good organisation skills to plan ahead for anything that could go wrong in your plans, and try to take some deep breaths. Your sisters Gemini might be driving you nuts, dancing and laughing in the chaos, but don't whip them with your long beautiful hair in anger. Instead, use this as a time to fight back at the chaos with some super reorganizing and de-cluttering of your home.


Libra


The people you love so dearly in life are going through some stuff (we can't all be level headed Libras) and as someone who values their relationships above all else, this could upset you. Be patient with people during this trying time, and if you can, be a shoulder for them to lean on. You're good at this! Thanks Libra. Thanks for dealing with our sht.


Scorpio


Scorpio, you are just this agile little scorpion, anticipating all the hoops and jumps as they come your way and navigating them with relative ease. You don't particularly like doing it, but you can. You're level headed enough to get through this Mercury in Retrograde while the rest of us are all putting the milk in the cupboard and the cereal in the fridge and then going out and getting a full fringe.


Sagittarius 


Your inability to blast through life at god like speed as you usually do can leave you feeling the urge to draw one of your arrows that you always have on you for some reason. But wait! Leave extra time for planning your trips this month, and try not to give anyone any definite times of arrival (this way, you don't have to get stressed  about being late when the Aries bus driver storms off the broken bus and rams his head into the back of it, with the Aquarius on board chasing after him to pour some cooling water on his head).

So, my friends, why is Mercury in Retrograde such a big deal?

Me: *gestures broadly at everything* look around you. 


Basically it stresses a lot of signs out, particularly signs who like to be in control of themselves and/or the world around them. For you chill signs, you should be OK. And if you can, stop us from texting our exes and making any big decisions about our appearance.

An Aquarian Perspective


Right, as an Aquarius I flippin' hate Mercury in Retrograde. I'm supposed to be chill about it but I'm not to be honest. I am an Aquarius, but I have a lot of Capricorn in me and I don't like losing control. I've been feeling very frazzled lately, like my plans are not... going to plan. Issues seem to be cropping up everywhere and I'm feeling constantly on edge. Yay! 

Alas, at the same time, the Aquarius in me wants to learn from the setbacks and adapt. But grrr do I feel stubborn about it haha. 

Food for thought: What is your sign and how are you feeling lately? What are the strengths and weaknesses of your chart and how can you use these to your advantage this Mercury in Retrograde season?